XOXO's: Dedicated to all things love and marriage!

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Date night idea: "OUR" bucket list

Love him...

This week's mommy daddy date night isn't going to be anything egg-stravant (get it... egg? For Easter?) Ok, that was straight cheesy. With Easter on Sunday, I don't have alot of time to do anything complicated... But I was doing some thinking this week about the future... I don't mean anything crazy philosophical or anything, but what do I hope to do in the future with my hubby? Before baby came, we went on vacat2ions all the time, bought impulsivee things, and spared no expense when it came to fun! But now, obvi, we have to plan and save. Life's priorities change, but that certainly doesn't mean we cannot still do fun things together! That being said, this weekend, we are spending our date night with a bottle of wine, some music playing, and putting together a "couple's bucket list". What are some things he really wants to before he is old and can't do them? What do I want to experience? What do we want to experience together? To me, the couple that does things together stays together- and this will be a fun way to plan out our next 50 years! And of course, some of the items will be for the whole family, sweet babe included. Some will be serious, some will be funny, but all will be creating memories!

Here is a glimpse into mine:
-Take a picture every year, at the same time, so that we can look back in 50 years and see how much we have changed!
-Pick out each other's outfits
-Run a 5k together (and train for it together, too!)
-Take dance lessons
-Visit Ireland
-Write each other a love letter of all the reasons we love being with each other, only to be opened if 1.) things get rough or 2.) when we have been married for 40 years.
-Go on a road trip to nowhere, and see where we end up. Take a week off from work, and just drive.

So there are a few of mine...what are yours?

Thursday, March 21, 2013

XOXO time!

Wow, marriage is no joke...Especially after a baby comes along. I thought people were full of it when they told me how quickly, and how much, things will change once baby arrives.. I used to tell them they were crazy, nutty, so wrong...and then Ledoux came. And everything they said was true. Your patience is close to gone, your tired, you seem to start to find those little annoyances before the baby to be HUGE annoyances...anyone else feel this way? Ok, I am glad it isn't just me. That being said, my honey is my best friend, and I have quickly realized that I have to really WORK on marriage to make it not only successful, but just as wonderful as it was before. With Ledoux in our lives, we have to be alot more intentional about what, and when, we spend time together.

Enter: Mommy Daddy date nights. No, these don't require money and a baby sitter... rather I have started doing Mommy Daddy date night, at home,after Ledoux goes to bed.

Here is a glimpse into this weekend's "date"

A note left the morning of...

1.) DIY Pizza. I will already have the topping purchased (We love Chicken, Turkey Bacon, Tomato, and Avocado, with light ranch drizzled on the top!) but you can do whatever you like... heck even just a plain pepperoni would work. Making pizza together is fun, although I am pretty sure we end of eating the toppings before they even get on the pizza. Whatevs. I keep it all a secret until the date starts (aka baby is in bed!)

2.) After dinner, it is all about 'getting to know you' Ok, you are probably thinking "Um you are married, why are you doing this?" Think about it, how often do we actually sit down with our significant other and really talk? I have a list of fab questions we are going to ask each other (over a bottle of wine, of course!) Here is my list of questions (Pretty excited to hear his answers!)

So there you have it, my date night for this weekend...anyone else doing anything fun? I am always looking for fun new ideas!

Monday, March 18th, 2013

A post about Marriage

Such a great article about marriage...

During a seminar, a woman asked," How do I know if I am with the right person?"
...
The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind replied the author.

Here's the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet."Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):

The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO..